october 16, 2026 - 11:05 pm EDT
youtube showed me an ice skating video and now i wanna get into rollerblading i remember it feeling so cooloctober 16, 2026 - 5:45 pm EDT
i ate a bunch of oreos and my tummy hurtsoctober 15, 2026 - 8:22 pm EDT
i cant wait until i dont have to do school anymore but im also terrified for when i wont have school anymore and need to support my own lifeoctober 15, 2026 - 8:00 pm EDT
i feel like i have like no patience if i havent taken my adderalloctober 15, 2026 - 7:37 pm EDT
i'd like to make a system that lets me write blog posts without having to edit the whole page, having my own tiny place is comfyoctober 15, 2026 - 1:38 pm EDT
the other night i rewatched all of bocchi the rock. it really is such an amazing show...october 15, 2026 - 1:37 pm EDT
i was starting to feel better but my stupid brain managed to remind me thats not allowed. i miss feeling alive.october 13, 2026 - 2:02 pm EDT
i checked my balances.. i actually need to make $3k gulp...
october 12, 2026 - 4:35 pm EDT
i dont have a job but i need to make $2,000 in the next two months so uhhh hmmmmmmmmmmmm uhhhhhhhhhhhhh uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
october 12, 2026 - 12:38 am EDT
october 11, 2026 - 5:20 pm EDT
been taking the time to get familiar with Krita. i'm liking it :)KDE is so cool
october 11, 2026 - 12:20 am EDT
i got two assignments done today, one of which isn't due for like another weekand i even made progress on one i really didnt wanna do and it's going swimmingly
october 11, 2026 - 12:17 am EDT
A Beginning of Something Wonderful by Orange and Lemonsgood song
i prefer the original and wish it was on music platforms but the remake is good too
october 10, 2026 - 5:17 pm EDT
i was anxious about this network programming assignment and it took one hour. actually less. like baby mode python stuff
october 10, 2026 - 4:12 pm EDT
i've been enjoying referring to anything cartoony or cartoon-related as "it's cartoons" or "it's like cartoons"
october 7, 2026 - 6:54 pm EDT
i started drawing a 4-panel style diary comici've wanted to get back into comics for the longest time
it's kind of raw and personal and crappy, but i'm drawing
[link]
october 7, 2026 - 12:30 pm EDT
ok ko is making me miss animating againit's also reminding me that i love animation and i'll always want to be an animator
october 6, 2026 - 8:35 pm EDT
this is the best thing everhttps://x.com/pkgkb_yk/status/2096612876228452389
october 6, 2026 - 8:33 pm EDT
girl who's super cute and moe and also really cool and awesome, like super strongi love when there's a character that's small but still really cool and strong
like kirby
anime girl that's like kirby
october 6, 2026 - 8:31 pm EDT
we have lots of anime that's cute girls doing cute things, and that's wonderfuli propose cute girls doing cool things like being really cool and stuff
october 6, 2026 - 8:29 pm EDT
i miss OK K.O. that was a really good cartoons
october 5, 2026 - 10:15 pm EDT
warning: talk of depression/ocd (the really bad things that come with those.)This year has been very hard on me.
Good things happened. But I've been dealing with mental health trouble for some time now.
For a while, I was doing much better. Earlier last year, I was in a really bad place. By letting it go unchecked, I caused stress for people I love.
Since then, I've been afraid of repeating my mistakes.
At some point recently, I started to feel like I was getting worse. I don't remember when. I tried to avoid it and thought I could shake it off.
Additionally, in May of this year, I learned that my dosing for HRT was too low to have any effect. Technically, this means I properly started HRT about 4-5 months ago.
I assume this is a big part of why emotions have felt much stronger for me lately. I feel them much more deeply. It's really great, but it's also scary.
In tandem with my depression, anxiety, and OCD (according to my therapist), bad feelings can become much heavier.
There are ways to solve these things but these things make it hard to take care of yourself in general.
OCD is especially scary. Intrusive thoughts can become unbearable. It feels like an evil version of yourself is screaming in your ear.
Sometime this year, the fear I was once able to free myself from got harder to control again.
The fear that I don't belong, that I'm not wanted or lovable.
That makes it often difficult to believe reassurance even when I'm given nothing but kindness and patience and love.
I tried to push back against that feeling but it got overwhelming.
This month I fell apart for the first time in a very long time.
I haven't trusted myself for a while. I've been afraid of becoming a burden again. I didn't realize the lack of faith in myself was part of the problem.
I carry a lot of intense insecurity and hatred for myself. I overcame it for a little while. I know it's possible.
My mind and body feel like a prison.
I want to be happy again.
I realized this wasn't going away if I didn't make an effort to figure myself out.
I don't want to be an angry person. I don't want to be a mean person. I just want to make people happy. I want to make people laugh and smile.
I want to be someone the people I care about can count on to make them feel happy and loved and safe.
I want to be someone that makes my friends' lives easier, not harder.
I want to be someone people can go to if they need help, or just want to feel a little better than before.
I want to help my loved ones feel hope if things feel hopeless.
I need to be patient and pull myself together in a shape that can grow into the person I want to be.
Someone with genuine positivity and warmth to share. Someone that just wants the best for the people around her.
Someone that doesn't let insecurity run her life. Someone that can be okay.
I have a lot of love in my heart that I want to share. I don't want to let myself become defined by hurt.
I want to be a kind person that makes my friends happy.
I just wanna be someone silly and kind that makes people feel at ease, not anxious or stressed.
october 16, 2025 - 12:09 am EDT
the secret life hack they don't want you to know is that if you eat more than a single wendy's sandwich before 7 pm you actually don't feel like total shit
october 16, 2025 - 12:06 am EDT
task view is useful on windows after alland having separate browser profile for school and not school
easier to focus
didnt even need medication or caffeine this time
october 16, 2025 - 12:03 am EDT
didnt have much time for physics homework, so didnt bother reading lecture notes, just figured out the problems with the formula sheet as a guideit worked out more or less
7/10 questions correct without looking anything up
october 14, 2025 - 5:19 pm
stressed
october 9, 2025 - 6:09 pm EDT
wonder how many people who work at microsoft hate the changes as much as everyone else and use the same registry edits to fix it too
october 9, 2025 - 6:08 pm EDT
disabling web search in windows search one of the best decisions i ever madeit actually just works i can search for things on my computer instead of Bing dot com please use copilot or what everrr
october 9, 2025 - 4:58 pm EDT
physics exam in 2 hours uhgh i have no idea what im doing aaahhhhhhhhhghghhhghghg
october 9, 2025 - 3:25 pm EDT
new memo look for time being wil be like eyes covered kris deltarune style probably
october 9, 2025 - 2:58 pm EDT
last 30 minutes of discrete math lecture
october 7, 2025
it's probably possible to develop a way to make posts without needing to edit the whole page every time
october 7, 2025 - 5:02 pm EDT
i want to request some time off from work to focus on getting everything else sortedbut i need to keep earning money, it's important
and i worry about letting that weekend off become a different kind of pressure
to do things i normally can't because of work
i just want to sleep without thinking about how much work i should be doing
october 7, 2025 - 4:56 pm EDT
haircut next weekgot a really nice new shelf and happy about that
gotta go for an oil change this week too
friend birthday soon too
october 7, 2025 - 4:52 pm EDT
as long as i pass all my classes this semester. the rest of university will be so much better.physics 2 and discrete math 2 are crucial
and a lot of work
but we'll make it through and be able to look back on them with a feeling of accomplishment.
october 7, 2025 - 4:49 pm EDT
physics exam this weekbeen really tired
have to keep studying or i'll fall behind
falling behind is not recommended
october 2, 2025 - 11:05 pm EDT
web development is really cool and fun! i have to shit
september 30, 2025 - 6:01 pm EDT
javascript is so fun it makes me want to be late for class
september 30, 2025 - 4:23 pm EDT
i want to participate in a game jam really soon. BUT I AM SO BUSY
september 29, 2025 - 9:21 pm EDT
why am i busy all day every day all freaking week!!!!!!!!!!!
september 29, 2025 - 8:06 pm EDT
buuuhhhhhhhh. i wanna talk to my friends and i wanna make video games. but the. endless studies consume all
september 29, 2025 - 3:26 pm EDT
memobee.net. yay!